It’s magical, but it’s real. All my emotions, every whispered hope for Ryan, found a place in the depths of my heart, yet remained unspoken. “Nice to meet you too, Adunni,” Ryan’s voice, soft and sure, sent ripples of ecstasy through me, his handshake a promise of connection. He proceeded to ask me what am I doing here all alone? It was a lovely evening to take a walk, to look at the flowers blossom, it was autumn, a time for the world to be vibrant and the season for greens to flourish. It was a perfect day to meet Ryan, though he gently revealed he was already bound in matrimony, a truth I anticipated given his wisdom and striking presence. Not like I wasn’t expecting him to have a woman in his life, considering his age and his look. Oh, Ryan, he was captivating, a living masterpiece.

Days and months have passed since I first met Ryan, and I have met his family, such a sweet loving family, witnessing the tender bonds that wove them together. Now I know why he’s amazing not only at sight. He puts his family first, such a hardworking farmer. The sprawling farm in Willowbrook village, with its thriving livestock, belongs to Ryan. It became my ritual to pass by, letting the serenity of nature soothe my restless soul. I love everything about nature and this is one of the reasons I have moved to Willowbrook, it calms my nerves and makes me sane. It’s been a whole year, and all we do is talk about farms, livestock, the village, and family. How I managed to conceal my heart’s desires for twelve months remains a mystery, but I refused to relinquish my guard. Not a chance am I letting my guard down. I have watched him lead his family to different outings, oh am I stalking now? Not a chance, am better than this. A reminder to self. Is this just lust? Obsession? Or love? I have asked myself several times, but how can I lust over a man who belongs to another? But all of this is out of a longing heart.

Many nights, in the quiet of my dreams, I have wandered through a realm of desire and tenderness, longing and affection. My heart danced to a tender rhythm, synchronised with the gentle cadence of his voice. Every stolen glance, every shared smile, formed the tapestry connection, a tapestry that seems to have grown more intricate with each passing moment. As I closed my eyes, I could feel the warmth of his presence, an invisible force that wraps me in safety and belongings. I strolled hand in hand with Ryan along the shores of an imaginary sea, the waves whispering secrets only I could comprehend. His laughter was the sweetest melody, and the light in his eyes was a beacon of hope, a warm glow to the path as we walked together. Oh, it’s all a dream, I am back to reality, he’s not mine, he belongs to another, a reminder to self. Well, I am internally grateful knowing that somewhere in the universe, the dreamland, my hearts and that of Ryan beats in harmonious resonance.

How much longer could I hold on, clinging to hopes and dreams intertwined with another woman’s reality? My sanity wavered, questioning the purpose of this silent suffering. Ryan remained oblivious to my feelings, a truth I was determined to preserve. I needed to move forward, to find a man who could pull me from my reverie. And then, a memory surfaced, of Chris, a sweet soul from my past. A path I hesitated to revisit, for though Chris was kind, I knew I couldn’t invite him back into my life. Why did I find myself ensnared in these maddening twists of fate? Perhaps a glimpse into my history with Chris would shed light on the tangled web of my heart. Chris, dark skin with a charming smile.

To be continued…………